So that is our new label. Cancer chicks!!! We both have stage 4 cancer and decided that we are going to make this year fun and achieve all our goals. We have promised each other to make a list of what we want to achieve and make sure that we each stay on our path.
I asked her what she wanted her children to remember of her. She said – Strength. That their mother was a strong woman. That she gave them their strength and their independence at a young age. She has done this beautifully. I admire the path that she chose: To give her children their own lives, even if that meant for her letting go. That is pure strength and beauty. To really let go and let your children go so they can soar. I am amazed at her courage. I wish I could tell the world about the gift that she gave to her children when she was diagnosed. It is the truest act of going with your heart and not operating from what should happen or being on a track with what society says we should do.
I confessed that I spent the morning yelling at my son – and then said I want my kids to remember their mother as a fun and loving woman. (Not off to a good start with that one today). But most of all, I want them to remember that I really, really loved them. Hopefully I can help them believe that they can be anything they want and to truly love themselves.
Over coffee we crammed in months of unspoken conversations. I felt high on the energy of us being together. We cried because we feel comfortable crying with each other. I think we have both exhausted others with our tears and fears. We confessed we get so very tired we can’t move. That our immune system feels shot. That because of early menopause for the first time we are having skin breakouts!!!
We confessed that this is the year for making things happen.
Happen they will.
It was a morning of holding hands, not being afraid to be completely honest – and I mean really honest – about what is in our heart. To talk about our cancer in such an honest way is freeing. This was a big release that needed to happen.
It is so comforting to be with her because we can talk about our cancer, our outcome, if and when it spreads what options would we have. What we are scared of, how it affects others. We are honest with each other. Cancer may have brought us together, but our friendship is so much more than that: She is my hero. How many of us can say we have a hero in our life? She makes magic happen!
I shall follow her lead.
So to you my friend, if you read this, know what you gave your children – magic, courage and great love to be everything.
One out of the two Cancer Chicks who are making things happen!!!